Frustrating My Father

It’s no secret and, of course, no surprise, that I love my son. My love for him is so intense that I sometimes wonder if I could even love another child should God ever give me another. Of course, I know I could – but having only one, it feels as though I have none to share with another. Perhaps other parents can relate to this feeling.

It’s also no secret that my little boy loves cars. Which, even as I say it, is automatically, an understatement. (Automatically is a pun, by the way!)

His is crazy – nuts – about cars! Instead of a train table like many boys, he has a “car table.” His room is decorated with cars. His favorite movie is Disney’s Cars movie, and any time he gets any present, if it isn’t a car – he is almost disappointed. When I return from a trip, he hopes I will come back with a new car for him.

The Man Cave in Estes Park, Colorado!

So here is the point of my post – there are times Luke nearly breaks my heart. When we are at a place that sells the most incredible cars – amazing cars – incredible cars – awesome cars – and as his loving Daddy I want to buy him one! And he isn’t interested.

There have been times when we have been at a place with the most spectacular cars, expensive even, and I’ve been willing to fork out the dough for one of them, and Luke has only wanted one of the cheap little $1 cars, like we have a zillion of at home. And no matter how hard I try, I can’t convince him to let me buy him one of the really nice ones. Of course, I should be happy at the money I’m saving, but as his dad, I want to bless him with one of the really cool ones knowing that in time, it will mean more to him and is more valuable. But he just politely says, “No thank you, Dad.”

This past weekend at the Mile High Flea Market it happened again. There was a booth with some model cars that are $30-$45 anywhere else for only $12. I tried so hard to convince him to pick one. “No thanks, Dad. I have enough cars.” The irony of that statement, was he was only using that line because that is what I say when he is asking for some cheap car I am explaining why I am saying, “No.” So here he is saying “no” to a car that I know he will enjoy and that would enhance his collection and is worth throwing twenty of his cheap cars in the garbage over.

I wrestled with whether to just buy one and give it to him later – but really couldn’t decide which one, as he is very particular in his choices, and if I picked the wrong one, I’d still be wasting $12 if he didn’t like it. And I decided it would still be better to save the money and help him realize later that choices have consequences should he change his mind. (Since we’ll be going back to that flea market again.)

Even his new bike is a Hot Wheels bike w/ Speedometer!

MY POINT? I wonder how many times I frustrate my Heavenly Father? I wonder how many times God wants to give me things but I settle for less? He certainly loves me as His child and has given me a lot, but he wants to give me more!

“Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him?!Matthew 7:9-11

Just as I try to give good things to Luke, and he says, “No thank you, Dad” instead of trusting me and saying, “Sure, Daddy” and just letting me bless him – I say to God, “No thank you, God” when I should be saying, “O.K., God, I accept!” I say no by holding on to sin, by not walking in trust, by not taking the risks He presents me with, by not taking chances He places before me where I’ll need His help.

How many times do I frustrate my Father by saying, “No thank you, Daddy?” when I should be saying, “Sure, whatever you say, Daddy!” and just accepting what He wants to give me?

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3 Comments:

  1. Thank you, Karl. You made the point, and I understand now. How many times have I said my heavenly Father, “No, I don’t want that”, or I say “Not that one, Father, the other one”, and it was the wrong choice (as I realised later).
    I have done that with my own father, and now I regret it. I can’t say sorry, since my Dad is in Heaven now.

    Thank you.
    Werner

  2. I remember wondering if I would be able to love my second son while he was still in the womb, and even moments after he was born. Now, I can’t imagine my life without either one of my boys (or my wife!). The heart is an extremely flexible and elastic part of the human soul: very capable of both shrinking and swelling. Keep it growing by loving every precious minute you have with your son (or, someday, sons or children).

    Thanks for sharing! I love how being a dad has opened my eyes to seeing God’s heart for his kids. I have some thinking of my own to do now…
    .-= Sean´s last blog ..Done With Airplanes =-.

  3. great post.

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