Instead of a Christmas Letter this year (December was just to crazy this year!) I opted for a more electronically savvy method, and created a video to reflect on 2011. Besides, it was too hard to choose which pictures to put into a letter – we started one, and which pictures to choose, was so hard!

This year included a trip to California to see my childhood best friend, Andy, get married, (and a trip to DisneyLand while there) and another trip back later in the year to perform my first wedding for his little sister, Lindsay!

We enjoyed many visits from friends coming to enjoy Colorado and stay with us (when are YOU coming?) and enjoying this beautiful state ourselves as we still discover its vast beauty!

Luke turned 5, and wanted a “real Jeep” for his birthday, so I rented a Jeep for the day! I started “Dad School” a mini-home school to focus on the areas he needed help, and also “Family Pit Stops,” our evening family devotional times as he got old enough for intentional spiritual input from Dad.

Sara is a table leader for MOPS at our church and I continue to write a children’s church curriculum called DiscipleTown in addition to leading Kidology. I wrap up a two year column in Children’s Ministry Magazine after being named one of the Top 20 Leaders in the past 20 years, which was a pretty big surprise and honor. We added three new employees this year, with new VP of Operations starting January 1st, so we are pretty excited about what God has in store for our little ministry.

In addition to my fourth Yosemite Summit, I also got to take Luke and Sara this year – and seeing Luke discover my favorite place on earth, and show him all my “secret places” the tourists walk right past was a real treat, and watching him find his own, “secret places” that he wants to come back to someday. And extra bonus, after speaking at two camps this year, was being invited back to one on short notice (a previously scheduled speaker got called to heaven on short notice) I took my dad with me and we added on a trip to Yosemite, just as father and son – yet another highlight of the year for me personally.

So 2011 was a busy year, but a good year. In 2012, I hope to find a slower pace and perhaps some more margin, but am still eagerly excited to see what God has in store for my family.

Thank you to everyone who calls us family, friends, and who supports us in prayer. If you are not a part of my personal prayer support e-mail list, it’s called the Kidology Champion Prayer Supports List, and you can subscribe here. Just update your Kidology Newsletters to include that list.

I hope you had a Merry Christmas, and we wish you a Happy New Year from our family to yours!

Karl, for Sara and Luke too!

Enjoy our “Year in Review” Video:

DAY #22: Tennis Balls

OK, this post isn’t really about tennis balls, it’s about my grammy, but I knew that title might generate some curiosity and therefore some clicks!

I am Thankful for My Grammy! (and Tennis Balls… keep reading!)

I do not mean to elevate any relative above any other… I am thankful for ALL my relatives, and love them all differently and in different ways. But my Grammy B will always hold an extra special place in my heart. One of those reasons she and I kept secret. It wasn’t until after she passed away, that I finally let the secret out. In fact, at her grave side service, they let the children draw on her casket, and I drew a tennis ball on her casket with the words, “I win.” Relatives looked at me a little confused (and perhaps slightly shocked!) Here is why.

One of my “Kidologist Secrets” of relating to kids is to have fun games or “inside jokes” with the kids who I love. It makes them feel special – and let’s them know they are more than just another kid to me. They are unique. They are one of my favorites. I’ve always had a running joke that I was my Grammy’s favorite of her nine grandchildren. Of course, I assumed every grandchild believed that! But it was a theory I loved to humorously defend. In fact, at my grammy’s wake, in one of the photo albums featuring full sized photos of her grandkids, when I discovered I was on page one, I proudly declared, “See!? I was her favorite!” and was greeted with groans and rolled eyes.

Imagine my surprise when during the memorial service my father read a note written by my Grammy where she wrote,

“To set the matter straight as to my favorite grandchild, not withstanding Karl’s claims to whit – I loved all my grandchildren the same.”

Everybody laughed. I had no idea my claimed to favoritehood had gained Grammy’s attention to the point she decided to set the record the straight in her service! It was all in good spirit, and the teasing I got afterward was well deserved!

But there was a reason I felt extra special I can now reveal that I shared during the service that began some thirty years ago, and that applied to children’s ministry and what I mentioned as I began…  the power of secret game that makes a child feel extra special, even for thirty years!

When I was ten years old I saved up my money and bought my own ticket to fly from California to Indiana to spend a summer living with my grand parents. (I did this several times actually.) During the first visit they set up a room for me in the basement that became my home-away-from-home. And I loved these stays with Grammy and Grandpa!

I went to Cubs games with Grampa and learned to sew from Grammy. (That Garfield puppet was the beginnings of making puppet costumes, though Grampa didn’t really approve of that.) I went downtown Chicago on the train with Grammy often and in the evenings watched Columbo and played Rummy – a card game. However, one of my ways of entertaining myself was to toss tennis balls at the stairs in the basement like a pitch back and one time I left them on the stairs and later, Grammy gave me a very gentle scolding not to leave them on the stairs lest she step on one and fall down the stairs. But the next day, I accidentally left all four on tennis balls on the stairs again. Instead of just scolding me, she instead humorously reminded me by saying that she thought my tennis balls were out to get her as they looked like they were coming to get her, because they were higher up the stairs this time, each on a separate stair, and I’d better lock them up, because obviously, I couldn’t have left them there, since she told me yesterday to put them away after I played with them. I played along and said I had put them away and that they must be alive. (I said it in a way that she knew I wasn’t lying, I was playing along.)

The next day, to keep the joke going, after I played with the four tennis balls, I remembered the kind way she had reminded me, but instead of putting them away, I put them in the kitchen, at the top of the stairs, four in a row, across the kitchen, as though they were “alive” and heading toward her room. Instead of her making a joke about it, she simply moved them later, placing them four in row in the basement heading toward my room.

This began an unspoken joke, that lasted thirty years. All that summer, the tennis balls continued to be placed, when the other wasn’t around, four in row closer and closer to the others room, until they were in each other’s bed. Then in our clothes, and then finally just being hidden in places we were sure to find. When I finally flew home, I found the tennis balls packed in my luggage. Grammy assumed the game was over. Little did she know!

When I returned the next summer, the tennis balls returned with me! Any time I came to visit as a young college man, a tennis ball was hidden in her home. I once lived with her for a summer in college and the tennis ball war was resumed though we never spoke a word of it! When she came to visit me, as a young married man, soon after, I would find a tennis ball somewhere in my house. Even as she lived in different states around the country, and me too, the tennis ball war continued, often with years between the secret placement, though over the years, it had at some point gone from the original four to just one strategically placed tennis ball. Many times we simply had to just buy a new one. It didn’t matter. It was more about leaving a tennis ball behind. It was our way of saying, “I love you, you’re special.” It was Grammy’s way of saying to me, “You’re still that little playful boy to me, and you always will be.”

I’ll look at tennis balls and cry sometimes now and people will think I’m nuts. But you will understand. A silly yellow ball holds a lot of love for me. All because my Grammy decided to be playful with a child, and then just decided never to stop. And people wonder why I thought I was her favorite. I’m O.K. with all her grand kids thinking they were her favorite. They all were, in different ways.

The same can be true in your kids ministry. You can have favorites. EVERY kid can be convinced that they are your favorite. And they can all be right!

People ask me all the time what’s the secret to connecting with kids. Have you figured it out yet? YOU are the secret.

(Originally Posted this story in September 2010 as Hiding Tennis Balls)

DAY #18: My Dad

While there may be some sons out there who have had the honor of having their dad appear on the cover of TIME magazine or some other newspaper or periodical, I must say that I can say, as the son of a preacher man, I was the proudest (in the most Godly way, of course) when MY dad made the cover of a magazine that I think says it all. You can have your TIME magazine “Man of Year” or People Magazine’s “Sexiest Man Alive” titles. In 1996 MY DAD made the COVER of a magazine whose bi-line is:

“A Wise Person Displays Understanding By His Godly Life as  Gentle Servant.”

There is probably no better description of my dad, so posting the cover of the magazine cover my dad was on was the best way I could think to “toot his horn” today, though it will embarrass him. Such is his character, for he made the cover of SERVANT magazine:

Humble Servant, Doug Bastian

That’s my dad. (Click to enlarge the cover in a new window)

I’m thankful to him for so many reasons, I should probably write a book about it someday, all the wisdom he has given me. As I’ve often said, he is a great dad not for being perfect, but for being real. There are no perfect dads. The best dads are not the perfect dads, but the ones who don’t pretend to me. Kids figure out early on that dads aren’t perfect, and think they have something on dad when they figure that out! But when dad blows their own cover by admitting their own humanness, and admitting they are on a journey in life, and inviting their children to walk with them on the journey of parenting and walking with Christ… the impact is trans-formative. Not only in parenting, but in the life of the child.

Mac and PC

I posted A Tribute to My Dad in the past, with lots of fun pictures of us from a long time ago, so I won’t post those pictures again or get too wordy again. This time, I justed to say THANKS to my dad for not telling me what it meant to be a servant in the home and in my ministry, but showing me. In fact, I don’t think he ever did actually tell me. He just lived it, and it just rubs off. And when I heard it preached later I thought, “Oh, that’s my dad.”

I’ve said it a thousand times,

“Discipling your kids isn’t something you ought to do… it is something you are doing.”

Your kids become you! My dad often quoted to me I Cor. 11:1, where Paul said to Timothy, “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.” In other words, where I saw my dad being like Christ, he wanted me to be like him, and when I saw him not being like Christ, he hoped I would have the objectivity to not imitate him in those times. I hope the same for my son. But for better or for worse, more and more, I am becoming my dad. It’s a scary thought some times (!), but over all, it’s a good thing. And that’s why I’m thankful for his example.

Thanks, dad, for always trying to imitate Christ.

DAY #13: Sara

Well, after being Thankful for My Son Luke yesterday, I’d be in the doghouse if I didn’t immediately post how thankful I am for my beautiful wife, Sara.

Sara and Karl - 1993, Galena, Illinois

He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.
- Proverbs 18:22

My mom had me start praying for my future wife when I was just a little boy. Perhaps she knew that the woman who had to live with me would have a tough assignment! Hyper-creativity, late hours, boundless energy and a dizzying number of hobbies and interests! A man who will starve to death if someone doesn’t remind him to eat or work all night if no one tells him to STOP and go to bed. A man who comes up with Big Ideas eight times a day – and needs someone to say, “that’s a good one…. no.” And who understands that the confidence he protects is much more fragile than it appears.

Karl, Sara and Luke's hand!

Life with Sara (and Luke) is a constant adventure. We live a rather simple and quiet life now, since we aren’t in weekly church ministry, we live to serve churches all over the country via Kidology.org from our home in Colorado. Sara enjoys ministering to moms via her MOPS table (she is a table leader) and through keeping this man going. “Did you take your heart meds?” (Ah!) “Have you eaten?”(Doh!) “When is your conference call?” (Yikes!) “When is your next column due?” (huh? Oh, no!)

Me and My Woman

Like every married couple (I hope!) we’ve struggled to learn how to do this “married life” thing – how to love selflessly and unconditionally. Marriage is a journey filled with ups and downs and when you see many marriages fail and many spouses give up on each other when they hit difficult times, I am so thankful to have a wife who has stuck with me even when I’ve been unlovable. Her grace in the difficult times has been a model of Christlikeness. Her willingness to trust me when I believed God was telling me to lead – like to sell our home in a bad economy and take our family across the country, and she said, “Where you go, I’ll go!” She has forgiven me when I’ve needed it, trusted me when I’ve said I think this is best for our family, and supported me when I’ve asked to put our family finances at risk for the sake of Kidology or a church ministry – her grace and trust and loyalty have meant the world to me.

And I’m thankful.

I recently did my first wedding, and preparing the message was insightful because I don’t feel like the “perfect husband” but here I was helping prepare a young couple, and a cousin of mine (Lindsay Blackwell) for her wedding, and preparing a message on marriage for those who would be gathered. They asked me to present a message that would not only be beneficial to them, but to those who would be gathered there. It was a good exercise for me – to be reminded of what makes a good marriage – and it was encouraging, because I felt like what I was saying to the audience was a good description of how our marriage operated. I’d have hated to stand up there and feel like a hypocrit! But in the end, I was saying what I lived, and how my own marriage operates, and I have Sara to thank for that, for a husband can not lead a home, unless he has a wife who will follow.

DAY #12: Luke

Yes, it’s been said in my house, many, many times…

But all kidding aside, I love telling the story of April Fool’s Day, 2006 when my life suddenly changed forever by a phone call from my sister asking me to help with a situation with a baby in need… later that day, I would be driving home with a baby that would become my son.

I still remember the moment (and the spot) on the I-294 when this baby was looking at me with wonder in his eyes, and I was trying to guard my heart against getting my hopes up, (the birth mom had offered him to me) and I heard God say, “Hold Nothing Back.” It was only three words, but I knew what it meant. It meant to open my heart to him, regardless of the consequences. Even if I did lose him. It wasn’t a promise that I’d get to adopt him. It was only a command to open my heart 100% regardless of what the future held. I turned to him and said, “Luke, I will love you, no matter what happens.” He closed his eyes and fell asleep. I began to cry. I believe in that moment, I became his father.

Elements of the story has been shared elsewhere on this blog, and more details I tell in person, not online – but every adoption story is unique and wonderful, but the sum of it all, is that God gave me and my wife a son.

This morning he made me breakfast:

He is the most loving and kind boy I have ever known. He fills our days with happiness and craziness even when we wears us out and tires us out. I was hurting from fifteen years of being childless while my life revolved around children and helping others love and minister to children. I honestly don’t know how I’d be doing today without the Gift of this boy, Luke Given Bastian.

I am so thankful for him, I could burst. There is no achievement or earthly success I have gained that matters to me any more, other than to see him look up at me and be happy. That’s why I stop working when he enters the room. He is my #1 job now, my ministry is important, yes, and satisfiying, yes, but my joy and happiness and deep fulfillment comes from pouring into this little guy.

Being the “Kidologist” is fun – I get to equip and encourage folks and follow God’s Calling on my life to serve others and reach many kids with the Good News of God’s Love and train others who minister to kids – but first and foremost, I’m just another Dad. And I’m loving every day of it.

It’s really just something I need to DO MYSELF – but I thought maybe others might want to join me, and I’d enjoy reading/seeing what others are thankful for. So you are welcome to use the Word doc, or just post in the forum what YOU are thankful for! So let me begin today, with my first post. These are NOT going to be in priority order, otherwise I’d have to go God, Family, etc. and then later on, people might judge me for putting one thing “above” or “before” another – so right out of the gate let me say, these posts will be in RANDOM ORDER of things I am THANKFUL FOR!

DAY 2 – God’s Word

DAY 3 – My Mom

DAY 4 – Photography

DAY 5 – Pandora

DAY 6 – George Lucas

DAY 7 – Breckenridge

DAY 8 – Barq’s

DAY 9 – Mercy & Grace

DAY 10 – Steves

DAY 11 – Freedom

DAY 12 – Luke

DAY 13 – Sara

DAY 14 – My Bookkeeper

DAY 15 – Science

DAY 16 – Da Cloud

DAY 17 – Awana & Sunday School

DAY 18 – My Dad

DAY 19 – True Friends

DAY 20 – Scottevest

DAY 21 – My Customers

DAY 22 – Tennis Balls

DAY 23 – Flight

DAY 24 – Jesus

He loves the opening scene when Lucy “kills” the pumpkin, so when we stopped on our Daddy/Son day to pick out a “Great Pumpkin” he said, “we must get a big one to kill.”

Here he is ready to begin the slaughter of our very own Great Pumpkin!

The fatal stab is struck and alas, the Gret Pumpkin is dead.

About to open up the pumpkin and see the inside of the head and the  “brains!”

Luke thinks the “brains” of the Great Pumpkin are pretty gross! Especially, when I tell him we need to reach in and pull them all out!

But, he does like the smell! LOL

The “brains!” Looking tasty!

Carving “The Great Pumpkin!” Daddy did most of this part, (of course!), but Luke drew what he wanted on the pumpkin with pencil and daddy followed it on the pumpkin pretty closely.

The Great Pumpkin and the Great Kid!

Putting a light inside the Great Pumpkin!

Now it’s time to bake the seeds!

The day ended when Mommy called to say good night and Lukey was able to tell her about our day and introduce her to The Great Pumpkin out on the front porch!

(Don’t miss reading out our hike to Castlewood Canyon earlier in the day!

We chose the latter, and headed out to Castlewood Canyon State Park!

We had a great time, and without mommy, of course, we were free to roam “off the trail” a little more than usual. (hehe)

And boy oh boy does this boy love to climb! Of course, I have a knack for taking pictures that look a lot higher than they really are!

Both of these above, Luke is about five feet off the ground. (LOL)

I would never let Luke climb up anywhere high!

I get such a kick out of him stopping every now, turning around and saying, “Take my picture daddy!” I can’t imagine where he got that!

At one point, Luke decided to show me how strong he was! I was pretty impressed! He was going to roll it all the way the down the hill, but I made him put the rock back where he found it.

But what is a hike without bringing some cars to play with? Hiking with Luke is unique, it involves stopping every so often to play with cars, especially if a great spot is discovered…

For example, this was a cool “car cave” we found!

This was my favorite picture of the day – if you click it to enlarge it, you’ll see he is splashing water. (It’s my Macbook Air wallpaper now!) We found this mini pool on the top of a ridge overlooking a beautiful vista and spend quite a while there just hanging out, playing cars and relaxing.

Since we didn’t have mommy, we missed out on her usual great picture taking, so there are no pics of daddy, so I had to get creative – and settle for one of my shadow pictures!

It was a great day! Next was ice cream and then off to pick out a pumpkin and carve it, but that’s tomorrow’s blog post!

I recently got a great new hiking book called Colorado Lake Hikes that I highly recommend. This was the first hike I’ve done in the book. We decided to visit St. Mary’s Lake and “Glacier.”

On the way, we spotted this beautiful water fall on the side of the road. That’s one of the things I love about living in Colorado – there are gorgeous spots like this all over the place. We can just pull over and Luke can get to play in Creation just off the side of the road. It was simply beautiful!

Soon we were on our way up the mountain. This was Luke’s second “real” hike. I haven’t had a chance to blog yet about our family vacation in Yosemite yet, where he hiked up to the top of Sentinel Dome! He is very proud of that feat!

He is proving to fit into nature just, well, naturally. I wonder where he gets his love of the outdoors from?

Luke wants to climb on top of every rock we pass… which adds quite of bit of time to the “hiking time estimate” that was in the hiking book!

Can you find mommy and Luke in this picture? By the way, every picture in this post can be clicked on to view larger in a new window!

We often call Luke “our little poser.” He climbs up on stuff and says, “Take my picture here, Daddy!” Hope he doesn’t outgrow that too quickly!

Spotted something beautiful through the trees!

It was an all uphill hike, but Luke held up pretty well for the most part…

Spotting WILD LIFE is always a highlight. We thought we heard a bear, but Luke claimed that was just Dad making toots! We’ll never know for sure.

But we did see lots of Chipmunks!

Finally, we reached the lake and glacier… which technically isn’t a glacier, but a “permanent snow pack.” There were a lot of “cool dudes” with snow boards hiking up there to surf down it! Crazy, we thought!

Just beyond those rocks, was the lake! And it was BEAUTIFUL!

But Luke wasn’t impressed. He was more interested in throwing rocks in the water:

and seeing how BIG of a splash he could make:

But at least the backdrop was nice:

467 splashes later I was able to get him to walk along the shore to where we settled down for some Birthday Cheesecake to celebrate 42 years of life!

THEN IT HAPPENED! A huge gust of wind came along and BLEW our stuff! My hands were full and I couldn’t stop the plastic container and yelled to Sara and Luke to grab the cheesecake dish but it was too late!

It blew “out to sea” as Luke said, and was gone!

It wasn’t just the potential $500 fine I was worried about, I love my state and the outdoors, I didn’t like the idea of leaving with this huge plastic “boat” (as Luke called it) floating out to the middle of the lake!

We kept an eye on it, and about a half hour later, the wind changed and it actually drifted back about 500 feet away and I was able to retrieve it! Luke thought it was the funniest part of the day and keeps telling people all about it!

Here we are! Luke didn’t want to leave his splash making for a picture, so we got creative with this picture… turned out even better we think!

I love the outdoors. It refreshes me. It refills me. It rejuvenates me. It recreates me. It refocuses me. It renews me.

People ask me why I moved to Colorado. I want to show them pictures like the one above and just say, “This is why.” Why would you want to live anywhere else, if you have a choice. I know I am blessed to have a choice. For now, God allows me to be here. So I am breathing deeply and filling my lungs with Colorado Air.

Next, we headed into Idaho Springs, and went BeauJo’s Pizza – a famous mountain town pizzaria joint here in Colorado, where I order Beaughetti! Spaghetti in a garlic bread pizza crust! Yum! Yum!

So to the 164 Facebook greeters, (new record this year!) and all those who wished me a happy birthday via Twitter and in the Kidology Forum too – THANKS!

I had a great birthday, and YOU were a part of making my day special!

But most of all, it was special, because I spent it with my two favorite people doing my favorite thing…

Saturday the family headed to the Pikes Peak Radio Control Club’s “Warbird’s Over Pike’s Peak’s Air Show”, and it was incredible! (Don’t miss HIGHLIGHT VIDEO at end of this post!)

NOTE: Click on any image to see larger in a new window.

For Luke, it was a real treat! He brought a box of toy airplanes and enjoying playing with his planes while watching grown men play with their toys. As the saying goes…

The difference between the men and the boys, is just the price of their toys!

It was hard to believe these things were not real! Especially when the jets went straight up into the air spinning until they were a speck in the sky!

They even SOUNDED like real jets… well, actually, there WERE real jets… just smaller and without a real person inside!

They literally flew up to the clouds! I had to use a telephoto lens to keep up with them!

Luke enjoyed chillin’ out on Daddy’s hammock, which I got for Father’s Day way back when he was just a baby… (remember?)

Everyone had their cameras out trying to capture these birds in the coolest pics possible – the pics in this post and in the video below, are from all three of us, me, my dad and his wife Patty.

The planes took turns putting on a show for everyone, and the stunts they did was just like being at a real airshow with real planes!

And getting to walk around and look at them and talk to the pilots was fun too. (That’s my dad and his wife.)

The variety was amazing. They even let us vote on our favorite and there were awards for the pilots in different categories. I felt good when the one I picked won for best design!

One of my favorite features, was the “little pilots” that a lot of controllers put into their planes:

Pretty amazing detail, isn’t it?

It was an incredible day for a young boy. I love taking him to things that show him you never need to grow up. You can pick a hobby and enjoy it into adulthood, whether or not airplanes is what he chooses, you can have fun at any age!

Days like Saturday are days well invested in your kids.

Even if it does make him think his toys are too small!

We can’t wait to get home and fly dad’s little remote control helicopter!

It may not be as cool as these eight to ten foot remote control airplanes that can soar through the air… but it shows my son that growing up is optional, and that is worth a day is the scorching heat.

That’ll teach him, that HE can soar in life, if he is willing to never grow up!

ENJOY THIS HIGHLIGHT VIDEO: *Recommended full screen!

There is an old saying that you can tell what’s important to someone by looking at their date book and their checkbook. Well, I think that saying needs to be updated to the modern world to be, “You can tell what’s important to someone by looking at their iPhone camera roll.”

Just glancing through mine and you can see what I’ve been up to.

We went to the local carnival this week, just Daddy and Boy and had a blast. (Well, my wallet didn’t but that’s a separate issue!)

We also enrolled in Swim Class. I’m not very impressed with the place – I was hoping they were going to push him a little further than Dad has, so far – blowing bubbles in the water is about all they have done… Dad is working on patience as he watches through the glass as they do stuff I’ve done with him for years… hopefully in the next week they’ll teach him something new and I’ll get my money’s worth, BUT at least he is having some fun.

We love to go for walks around the neighborhood. We have gotten to explore a few houses being built – and recently one that is ALL DONE was left unlocked for contractors doing final touches, so we were able to take off our shoes and walk through one we had seen when it was just framed. It was very cool to see it all done when we had seen it in several stages. I just hope we don’t meet the owners and Luke doesn’t say, “We have been in your house a bunch of times!”

We are learning the bike right now, and if we miss a day of evening bike rides (with Dad actually walking along side) Luke is disappointed. I have plans for a whole article comparing learning a bike to launching a new children’s ministry as I have thought of many parallels during this process. But it has been a very neat process to watch him overcome his fear from an early negative experience that had put off the bike to his growing skill and confidence. He is now eager for the time when the training wheels will come off.

And meals out with Dad are always a treat. Watching cars, airplanes and people are fun. He is so observant. And I marvel at his tender spirit, curious mind, and polite nature.

This week, I’ll be my sons coach and the Bible Story teacher for our sports camp at church – looking forward to that a lot.

But the best is always bedtime… the stories… the cuddling… the hiding from mom to delay the inevitable… the serious talks… the hiding in the closet and coming out with a new ‘monster’ costume on… last night I came out dressed as Mega Man! And then, of course, he had to try it on:

My work keeps my pretty busy – but never too busy for my boy. I’ll always have my work – but I won’t always have a little boy.

So this year, we asked Luke what he would like to do, and he chose The Denver Zoo! It ended up being a treat because his next store neighbor friend was able to come along for the fun!

Up close and personal with a lion!

I got up close to a cheetah... with a zoom lens anyway!

But Luke loves gorillas, so we had to head over the Primate Area!

Beware of Dangerous Primates on the loose!

I spotted two primates lurking right at the entrance to the area! They must have escaped from their cages! Oh No!

In case you are wondering what a “Primate” is… here are some sample:

Primate Samples!

First, some little primates…

Reminds me of a relative... not saying which!

And even littler ones..

Looks like an Ant Eater to me!

But finally, we got to the GORILLAS!

The Boys and the Gorillas

Luke admiring the Gorillas

Luke’s favorite non-domestic animal (he loves dogs) is Gorillas! He loves to play with them, had a t-shirt, discovered Gorilla snacks at the grocery store, and I’ve screened a few old-time King Kong YouTube videos for him! And of course, Casa Bonita here in Denver has a kid-friendly Gorilla he loves!

Could he be eating Gorilla Snacks?

I’ve even cued up the Gorilla sceen in Old Dogs for him – pretty funny!

Luke even got within ONE FOOT of a Great Ape and lived to tell about it!

Hope that glass is thick!

But then came MY favorite part of the day… the Bears! (and I’m not referring to the lousy team from Chicago either.) I love bears! I am a Yosemite Bear Chaser, having been very close to them every year in Yosemite.

First, I spotted this beautiful Black Bear about to eat a tasty little twig and I wondered if he might be the same bear from my oft told joke about the “Christian Bear” (pastors all know the joke, so I won’t tell it here – if you don’t, ask in comments, and I’ll tell it there!) when what to my amazement…

The Famous Christian Bear!

He folded his massive paws, bowed his head and prayed! Why, this IS the famous Christian Bear!

Then, his buddy came out to join him, another massive black bear… don’t let the brown fur fool ya!

Here’s a good way to see just how BIG these guys are! Scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours!

Such amazing creatures! Though I much prefer to see them in the wild, it was fun to be able to see them up close and so active today!

I love bears! So I decided to see what the Bible has to say about bears…

Better to meet a bear robbed of her cubs than a fool bent on folly.
Proverbs 17:12

It was a fun day – and of course, it’s so hard to believe we’ve had Luke for FIVE years! Time sure goes by FAST! That’s one of the reasons I started BeTheDadToday.com – to help ME and other dads make every day count as a dad. I’m actually recruiting a TEAM of dads to help me with the site, so the content on the Facebook Page and Twitter feed is going to be increasing.

If you are a Dad – let me encourage you to CHECK IT OUT!

Then today after only a few minutes he said, “Daddy, let me push you.” I was a little worried I’d clobber him on one of the return swings, but he did O.K. But then, after only a minute he got tired of pushing and said, “Why don’t you try pumping with your legs, Dad, I think you can probably do it on your own.” And walked away! Just like that! After all the visits to the park where I’d pushed him for loooong periods of time, never stopping until he was done, being such a patient and long suffering Dad, all he had for me was a minute!

I had to laugh to myself.

First, I had visions of when I was an older man and might need my son to push me around. But then I got to thinking of all the times God has been so long suffering and patient with me, and yet when it comes to giving HIM time – what do I do? A quick prayer at a meal? A zapped up prayer when I have a need? Maybe a prayer before a meeting or during a worship service? After all the time He has invested in me? Even my devotional prayers – how can they compare to the time He has invested in me?!?

You know friend, that is what Yosemite Summit is all about. It’s about finally giving back to God some extended time. He’s been supporting you during hard times, and pushing the swing of your family and ministry faithfully, patiently, never stopping to rest even once… it’s time you said,

“God, Let me come spend some time with you.”

It was an exciting day for ME, because I got to drive my family on a sled across the snowly plains with mountains on all sides of me! What a thrill it was indeed!

Luke got to see some dogs, which he LOVES but can’t own due to daddy’s alergies (and no e-mails about allergy-proof dogs, we aren’t going there, been there, tried that!)

Here’s proof that I LIKED the dogs, just ain’t gonna OWN one!

But mushing was a BLAST! And being on the sled with my wife and son inside was a really cool feeling! (Quite literally too)

I realize those dogs were in more control than me – but I since another guest DID wipe out (woman driver, ha!) there was some steering to it! And I was the only one that got to do some downhill driving, though it was mostly level the whole way.

We never got over 15 MPH, but it was very windy and snowing, so not sure I’d want to go faster…. nah… I wish I could have, just not with the family on board!

But how could there be a Leadership Lesson in my day of Mushing? Could there BE any lesson on Leadership from my day Mushing? I think so. These dogs have done this run a thousand times. A few of them have run the Iditarod in Alaska. Some as competitors, others as medical dogs. I’m merely a tourist who gets to feel like I’m doing the real thing here. The reality is, I’m just along for a ride. But they humor me and my family. (For a buck.) But they know the trail and run it well, really just for fun! What they ran with me today is really quite easy for them compared to what they are actually capable of, I’m sure!

Sometimes in life and leadership we get to thinking we are pretty hot stuff (or cold stuff in this case) but the reality is, we are just following a path that has been laid out for us ahead of time. Either by others who went before us, or – if not – by God Himself, who determined that He wanted us to do what we are doing, He chose us, gifted us, and prepared for us the very things we are doing. And while we might think it’s pretty impressive all we are doing, it’s actually a piece of cake for God compared to what He is capable of!

I Corinthians 4:7 is a verse my dad made me memorize as a young boy, “For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?” He saw that God had given me some gifts that would lead to a certain level of success in life, and wanted to make sure early on I never thought for a moment it had anything to do with me – but that I would always know, I was just riding a sled being pulled by God.

And if I ever got off that path, I’d end up looking like this:

Yup. That’s me. I did go off the trail to see just how deep the snow was, and it IS deep! Luke said later, “I didn’t like when you did that daddy, I thought you were going to sink and I’d have no more daddy!”

I think I’d better stay on the path for my son’s sake!

Andy and Karl around ~1976

While it’s true “me and Andy” were cousins, we were best friends growing up. When we were too young to remember, we were even next door neighbors for awhile. But for most of the time we were a bike apart – and bikes were what we used to head to the park, ball park and baseball card shops.

Andy and Karl 2011

So how exciting to be here today, and be asked to stand up in Andy’s wedding along with his good college buddy, Mark, and brother Scott. So, the whole family came into town and quickly got my fancy threads:

Secret Agent 004

And got ready for my important role. Do I look fancy smancy enough? But nearly as sharp as Andy and Tracy looked:

Mr. and Mrs. Andy Blackwell!

The photographer in me always enjoys watching the photographer at work, so I snagged a few photos of the photographer:

Photographers at Work

The Girls Posing

A Shot I was especially happy to capture, and by iPhone!

The Practice Kiss

I call it the “Practice Kiss” because this was before the wedding when we were taking pictures. Here’s one I took and touched up on my iPhone:

I always enjoy weddings. They are a great reminder of my own wedding and the promise of joy and happiness I felt then. There is an eagerness and anticipation in the faces of newlyweds that is contagious. The delight is the face of the groom for his bride and the reflection of the delight back in the face of the bride – she wants nothing more than to make him happy in every way. He wants to provide for her, to make her life easy and carefree and provide her with safety and security, and she in return wants to dote on him and be there for him providing warmth and comfort, and refuge from the harsh world he goes out to conquer for her.

But the real world soon sets in. Bills. Schedules. Demands. People. Relatives. Struggles. Conflicts. Real life. And the idealism of marriage can suffer and the original ideas can seem to fade – even seem to have been foolish. But were they foolish? Or were they the secret to survival? The pastor today said and read all the familar things today about love – I need not repeat them, you’ve heard them all before too. But I will repeat one thing he said. Love must be learned. I’m still learning. I’ve got a lot yet to learn. And every time I go to a wedding I want that look back. And I want to look at my bride that way again, and have her look at me that way again. And I don’t want to be a fool. I want it to be the secret to surviving this crazy world. Because this world knocks you down.

Perhaps that’s why the wisest man who ever lived once wrote:

⁸ There was a man all alone;
he had neither son nor brother.
There was no end to his toil,
yet his eyes were not content with his wealth.
“For whom am I toiling,” he asked,
“and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?”
This too is meaningless—
a miserable business!

⁹ Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
¹⁰ If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
¹¹ Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
¹² Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:8-12

The Bastian 3

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• Seventeen Years Ago Today
• 19th Anniversary of First Date
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It’s not uncommon for a restaurant to offer my son a balloon. But I didn’t expect my son to say, “Dad, can I give the balloon to God?”

My immediate instinct was to say no – thinking “That’s politically incorrect today!” You know, some bird might choke on it. It’s liter! But then the Holy Spirit whispered, “Your son is wanting to give a gift to God”, and suddenly I realized that wasn’t something I wanted to squelch. Sorry bird, but you choking is a risk I’m willing to take – at least once.

So I went and found a marker at the host’s station, wrote a note to God on the balloon, explained to Luke this might be a one-time thing, and then we went outside and sent his Gift up to God. What fun it was to watch it drift up into the sky.

After several minutes it was impossible to see, and then Luke said, “And now God has it. I wonder where He will put it? I hope He thinks of me when He sees it in His house.” If you ask me, God just might have plucked it out of the sky and put it somewhere in heaven, and I don’t think there is liter in God’s house up in the sky!

Sometimes we just have to set aside our grown-up hesitations and just give in to the impulses of childhood. I made a video of the ascension of Luke’s balloon on my iPhone and we watch it over and over!

What simple gift have you give God lately?

Be The Dad Today!

Karl Bastian

Dear Karl,

I had to respond to this email….  don’t know if you’ll ever get this, though. I loved the story of your son’s balloon gift to God! I am a balloon artist and I wanted to let you know that sending a LATEX balloon (the rubbery kind, not the shiny metallic ones) is NOT an environmental mishap! Latex balloons are 100% biodegradable and are made from a natural product, the harvesting of which actually helps prevent deforestation of the rain forest. Latex is harvested from trees as sap without harming them, in the same way maple syrup is harvested. The trees can live and produce latex for about 40 years.

Also, you can rest easy in knowing that animals are not interested in eating latex… it’s not on their list of favorite foods! If they did accidentally eat any, it would pass through their digestive system intact or break down and disappear. A latex balloon actually biodegrades at the same rate as an oak leaf! I think God loves balloon gifts, especially those coming from the hearts of kids!

Thanks for all you do!

Lynn ____ (last name removed)

I replied that now I can sleep peacefully knowing that I have not killed some innocent bread out there somewhere or caused the earth to end one day sooner than it would have otherwise. LOL

I actually wasn’t too worried about it – I was more worried about getting a bunch of hate e-mails from some environmental wackos out there “YOU LET A BALLOON UP! YOU EARTH HATER YOU!!!” Because most schools have banned the balloon launch practice that we all did as kids claiming it kills birds and harms the earth. I’ve always said that’s rubbish. (Note the pun) But people who don’t believe in heaven have only this earth to care for, so we have to cut them some slack I guess!

Anyway, I appreciated her note, as with several other encouraging replies I got. Funny, people are always surprised that I actually get my own e-mails! Only 1400 more to go! Good night folks!

Not to be confused with Home Schooling – though it is very similar, I have started something called “Dad School.” Now, all you home schoolers out there – don’t be offended that I’m not calling this home school, in fact, I’m seeking your advice! The only reason I’m making a distinction, is that home schooling is when you aren’t sending your kid to school. And my son does go to preschool and we will be sending him to full time school this fall. But in the meantime – I want to start pouring into him as his dad, while he is still in the home while he is young. There is so much I can teach him, and relationally the benefits will be huge!

I already do an evening “Family Pit Stop” for spiritual formation, but I’d like to invest just one hour a day in teaching my son other skills that he needs as a young boy, especially areas he is struggling with in school. We had our “parent-teacher” conference last week and learned where he is struggling, and what is a parent to do, say “O.K., that’s interesting?” Not me. I prayed about it and decided, just as it isn’t the church’s primary job to teach my boy about the Bible, it isn’t the school’s job to teach him his life skills either. If he is struggling – it is MY responsibility to step in and help. I took Luke for a walk that evening and we talked about school and where he needs help learning (turns out he is a lot like his daddy!) and we came up with the idea of “Dad School.” Of course, Luke loves the idea of a full hour with dad, but he also agreed that he would work hard – and I promised some rewards. We plan to surprise the teachers when the next test day comes around and they are surprised how well he does! He can’t wait to answer the question, “How did you learn all this?” and say, “In Dad School!”

So today was spent setting up Luke’s “classroom.” We got a really nice desk on clearance a few weeks ago at Pottery Barn kids (a floor display with a few bumps and bruises) and I took Luke to the “School Store” today, Lakeshore Learning Center. He is so excited! And I set him up on an old iMac we no longer use and he played his first learning computer game with Thomas the Train:

I’ve been a teacher in church for nearly twenty years, and I consider myself a pretty good parent – but I admit this is all new to me! I’ve got a bunch of supplies and a son whom I’ve earned respect and obedience from so I’m confident I can get him to focus for the hour (with a little wiggle room) but I’d love any advice on home schooling from you “pros” out there.

I have some specific goals for the next few months – many are obvious, the alphabet, upper and lower, numbers 1-20, learning small words, penmanship, etc. but then I want to get into some Christian history and biography and other areas that I know schools never touch. I remember the things my dad taught me informally (never calling it “Dad School,” though it was!) and I remember being at school and being surprised by the things my peers didn’t know that my dad had taught me. Its a heritage I want to intentionally pass on to my son now that I’m the dad.

So, all you home schoolers out there – I have the eager student, I have the “classroom,” I have the supplies, and I’m teachable!

Let me know your thoughts!

Update: O.K., I’ve had a few questions/requests if I had a “plan” and/or an actual lesson plan, which I do. Here is a copy of my first week’s lesson plan/overview. There is more behind it than I’m going to bother explaining here, but it’s just the skeleton to keep me on task and there is a rhyme and reason behind it – and more than meets the eye – but I do have a plan and a strategy. But it will give you an idea of where I’m headed at least initially.

Download: Dad School – Week One Lesson Plan/Overview (PDF 109kb)

I am excited to announce that I have launched a new ministry called BeTheDadToday.com – it is a new website for Dads, brought to you by a dad. Not a perfect dad, but an intentional dad who has been encouraged by many via facebook, his blog, twitter and in person to start a ministry to Dads – encouraging, coaching and providing insights on how to be – not a better dad (you are probably a great dad already!) but a more intentional dad.

There is plenty of great “parenting help” available – that’s NOT what this website is about. You may get some parenting help and guidance via BeTheDadToday, but that isn’t it’s primary goal. That may be a benefit of it – and if so, this author is grateful! But the goal of this website, the Twitter account and Facebook page will be to give Insights and Reminders on how to MAKE EVERY DAY COUNT.

Sometimes what dads need is not so much “Advice” as just REMINDERS. Nudges to do what they already know they should be doing.

Creating this site will do that very thing for me. I waited fifteen years to be a father, and the lessons I’ve learned I’ll share; and the wisdom I have, I learned from being the son of a very real and transparent father who was always very open about being a work in progress, as I am myself today.

So if you need nudges, want to make every day count, and are open to helpful suggestions on how you can too before your days as dad with kids in the house are over, then:

• Read this blog!
• Follow BeTheDadToday on Twitter and
• Friend the FaceBook Page
• Opt for Mobile Nudges!

And be ready to grow as a Dad!

Luke’s Dad.

Hear me dads: When we are doing our Pit Stop (as we call our family devotional time) Luke is often fiddling, fussing, fidgeting, etc. and I half wonder if he is “getting it” – but this video demonstrates that he is hearing it and learning, and there is lots he knows that comes up other times that isn’t reflected here in the video.

It was especially touching when we got to the Cross and Luke said, “I don’t want to learn about that, it’s sad” but then kept going back to that card with several questions.”

Enjoy:

Little does she know, we were texting plans to each other on ways we could bless our wives during this holiday season! We couldn’t talk lest they overhear us! Really!

We couldn’t believe our ears! We were at our church’s Family Gingerbread House making event, and there were well over 100 families making yummy houses. When they announced there was a competition and my wife saw my face slightly change she said, “You’re not competing are you?” I answered, “Of course!” (Men, you understand.) But I didn’t seriously think we had a chance, after all, I had a four year old on my team who I was not going to cut out of the process to increase my chances.

We struggled away with our house, since we didn’t cheat and use a kit (!) and even added shingles and a chimney! When we heard the ten minute warning three sides were still blank! I then realized that the chimney look a little like a steeple, so I quickly added a triangle and a cross just as we slapped on frosting and stuck candy all over the sides!

When I got to the tables and saw all the amazing creations I thought we don’t have a chance but as I was setting ours down I overheard the judges say, “Look at that and its not a kit.” Wow, that was encouraging!

When we ultimately won out of so many entries we were laughing all the way home. There were so many incredibly amazing creations there! Lots that, if I had been a judge, I would have chosen over my own. But for some reason, ours was chosen – perhaps for the family effort, the shingles, and the steeple. I mean, it IS a neat Gingerbread Church, I don’t mean to belittle our hard work. But there were some other amazing ones there too. We just DID NOT expect to win! But we’ll take it!

It made me think of Mary and Joseph – the most unlikely couple to be chosen to “win” the choice as the Parents of Son of God. A single teen age girl? A young man with no experience? Poor and unknown! So many others would have been more impressive.

But God chose them. Like us when we heard our name announced, they were probably laughing too that God chose them of all people!

Even when I look at the growth and impact of Kidology – and then consider myself, I have to laugh again. That God would choose me. God truly has a sense of humor as well as grace and delights in choosing those who don’t deserve to be used. I think that’s a big part of the meaning of both Christmas and the Cross.

We wish you a laughter filled Merry Christmas!

Once again it is time to post the Bastian Christmas Letter! We hope you are in the midst of enjoying a wonderful Christmas Season! As usual we are getting our letter out the week of Christmas! (Ahhhhhh!) We mail it to family and some friends, but to save on postage I also post it here on my blog so anyone interested can also download the PDF and enjoy it, just click on the image here:

Bastian Christmas Letter 2010 (3.1MB)

2010 was our first full year in Colorado and while I don’t feel I have taken advantage yet of all the reasons I move here, it was a fantastic year. I’m glad it wasn’t as busy as 2009 was!

In January, of course CPC is always a blast!

Then, in February, I went on a personal solo sabbatical to experience “Yosemite in Winter” snowshoeing the valley. It was incredible. I didn’t blog about it, as it was a personal time between me and God. But I did make this highlight video:

March saw another CPC – I’ve lost track how many I’ve been to, but I’ve been to every single once since 1995, so I’ve been to over 35 of them with all their locations, some years there being three! (See Why You Should Go to CPC)

In April I hiked Devil’s Backbone with some friends as the beginning of Hiking Group I’m trying to start in Colorado.

In May, I went on my third Yosemite Summit. This has become the highpoint of my year, as I unplug (quite literally!) from everything and spend almost a week disconnected from normal life with God and some other children’s ministers.

June was a real treat, as I finally got to go to Toronto to see my brothers town, just before the G4 riots and before he moved to Ohio! I also spoke in at the KidBuilders conference while I was there.

July brought be back to Camp Timber-lee for the zillionith time and August was mostly down family time.

September would have taken me to D6 but Family Trumped Family Ministry when my dear grandma passed away and I finally revealed a decades old secret!

In October, I decided to become a rat, and we lauched our Family Pit Stops, which have become a highlight of our family – and are mentioned in the Christmas Letter. (My dad says that reference in the Christmas Letter needs explanation and sounds like we all head to the restroom together. If so, read this link.)

In November, of course, I reflected on all I have to be thankful for, and then, before I knew it: December was here!

I do plan to do some re-thinking of how to integrate all my online data collection in the New Year… its tricky! But I do know, I much prefer things on my blog, as they are “safer” and better preserved than Facebook, but things are read more on Facebook.

Well, breakfast is ready… back to the REAL world!

I remember as a child singing,

“Count your blessings name them one by one, count your many blessings see what God has done…”

As we head into the week of Thanksgiving, I am especially overcome this week by all that I have to be thankful for this year, and how unworthy I am for all of it. So I thought I’d count my blessings and name them one by one…

• A beautiful and gracious wife who puts up with me even when I’m grouchy and irritable and expect too much of her and forget she is my wife not an employee…
• An adorable son who was Given to me out of the blue suddenly one day when I least expected it and has given me more reason to live than I ever had before…
• True friends who stick with me through thick and thin – who aren’t impressed with any of my accomplishments. They are friends of Karl, not the “Kidologist.” They aren’t fans, they are friends. I need those desperately. (Could use a few more, actually, here in Colorado.)
• Surviving a near heart attack in April 2009 that could have ended my life.
• An exciting ministry, that while wears me out and keeps my up late at times, provides incredible purpose and fulfillment in life as I serve my Lord and Savior. While it once was too much my identity, it is now how I give back to Him who saved me from myself…
• The privilege of having my “own” company – making a living by doing what I love and being able to pour into others and equip them to do what they love. (“own” is in quotes for I recognize my ministry belongs to the Lord.)
• Getting to write DiscipleTown children’s church curriculum for DiscipleLand is a dream come true, as well as to have a column in Group’s CM Mag and contribute to their CM Pro edition – blows me away – I do not take such opportunities for granted. I’m amazed every time I get such a chance to equip and encourage others. Or when I get to speak at the Children’s Pastors Conference or anywhere else. I’m still the little kid who just wanted to be a children’s evangelist when I grew up. I keep being surprised by what I get to do, and I’m exceedingly thankful!
• The opportunity to live in Colorado, a dream since childhood that came true this past year – the next best thing to living in heaven for me.
• The chance once a year to go to Yosemite, a decision I finally had to make after a challenge from a pastor.
• There’s more, of course, – but mostly for the Cross – where I continually get to lay my sin, right next to past sins, so that I can keep serving Jesus and enjoying His blessings, all undeserved.

Let me encourage you to “Count your blessings, Name them one by one. Count your many blessings see what God has done.”

Put them in comments here… on your blog or facebook page (and link here in comments)  – we NEED to do this – or we tend to focus on the negative and forget these things.

I am thankful today. I needed to count them. Thank you, Lord. You are so good to me, in spite of me. I love you.

We had a small tragedy in our home this morning. Charlie’s nose came off. It would only take me 2-3 minutes and some super glue to fix it – but what an opportunity for a memory!

I went down to my “children’s ministry closet” that is still stacked full of boxes from nearly 20 years as a children’s pastor and prayed, “Dear God, let one of the first three boxes I pull have my doctor outfit!”

The first box looked promising – as it had the doctor table cloth in it! But I struck out with the next few boxes and it looked like my plan of coming back up stairs dressed as a surgeon was not going to happen. Then I remembered something I’ve said more times than I can count in workshops across America,

“Kids love to pretend and as adults we are handicapped by our need to be realistic.”

So I just grabbed what I did have access to – a poncho and sombrero, that surgeon’s table cloth and walked back upstairs and introduced myself as “Doctor Poncho” and said, “I hear you have a dog whose nose has fallen off?”

My four year old, Luke, lit up and brought me the dog and the nose for examination. Of course, I treated this as a very serious matter, but not one that wasn’t treatable. But we would need some tools! So of to the garage we went for some of his daddy’s tools.

Soon an operating table was set up on the coffee table, and as long as we were operating we went ahead and turned him into a super dog like Bolt! (One of Luke’s favorite movies.)

The entire surgery took no longer than ten minutes, but it was a lot of fun. Luke even went and found a bowl and put it on his head so he could look like me!

He held the flash light and helped with the examination and held Charlie’s paw throughout the procedure in case he was in pain and to help him not to be scared comforting him just as we do when we have to put ice on a bump or pull a splinter. We talked about how we help him when he is hurt and how he was helping Charlie while he was hurt.

Finally, Charlie’s nose was like new. But not only that, Luke’s day was off to a great start. Every time he called me “Daddy,” of course I corrected him saying, “Daddy? Who is that? I’m Doctor Poncho!” Although, when it was all over he followed Doctor Poncho downstairs and I let him see me take the costume off and he said, “See, I knew it was you daddy!” And I just said, “Of course it was me – but isn’t it fun to pretend?”

We have a choice as parents. We can just fix the toy (which often I do, of course.) Or we can choose at times to take these opportunities to make a memory. To enter into our child’s world of pretending and make believe and play with them. When you do that, you strengthen your bond with them. That is the currency of relationship with children. Too often we want to kids to be more like us – to behave and grow up. Yes, they need to mature and learn and obey and all that. But if you want them to listen to you and respect you and love you, you need to go their way at times too. That is what relationships are all about. It’s true in your friendships and marriage too, right? Give and take. Why wouldn’t it be true with your kids. Do make believe.

What are you going to do TODAY or THIS WEEK to enter your child’s world? Have a tea party? Build a fort? Be an alien or a cowboy or just have a pillow fight? Or perhaps it will be something as crazy and unpredictable as being “Doctor Poncho!”

Keep your eyes open and be ready so you don’t miss it!