On this Father’s Day, I’d like to give you 12 reasons you should consider adoption:
The only thing greater than being a Dad is knowing you are giving a home to a child who otherwise wouldn’t being enjoying the life you are providing.
Enjoy this video highlight from my Father’s Day, we had a great day just enjoying each other. Truly every day is Father’s Day for me, after waiting 15 years to be a dad, I am soaking in each moment with my son. But in this case, the soaking, was quite literal, as you shall see!
Happy Father’s Day to all you dads out there, and a special greeting to my dad, who I did a blog tribute to a few years ago that is as true as ever!
But that was seven years after seeing her picture during my junior year of high school in a missionary slide show and deciding to write her a letter! Soon we were pen pals and an overseas friendship began from Chicago to Manila long before the Internet would have made it much easier to write back and forth. Each letter took two weeks to be answered so we maintained at times up to ten separate conversations as letters crisscrossed the globe. Eventually, I developed a growing love for the, uh, Filipino people, (yeah, that’s it!) and asked her father if I could come to the Philippines and be, uh, mentored by him during the summer after I graduated high school. Perhaps suspecting my ulterior motive, he requested I get a year of Bible college first before I could come as part of his mission’s summer intern program.I figured that was better than working for him for seven years and being given her ugly sister in marriage, and since she didn’t have a sister, the year of Bible college requirement seemed safe. So off to Moody Bible Institute I went. (I was going anyway, just for the record. I didn’t go to Bible college for a girl!) I did date in college, but no girl could compare to my pen pal over the sea, so I wrote to her dad again requesting a summer internship and he relented and let me come. He kept me busy! I did over 80 evangelistic programs in the 60 days I was there, discipled young men and did teacher training, but managed to sneak in some dating time (and a first kiss!) all with her parent’s blessing. (O.K. maybe not the kiss!)
A year later Sara arrived at Moody and was shocked that everyone knew her name, even the President of Moody greeted her by name and said, “You must be Sara!” She was embarrassed by her welcome. Little did she know how well known she was before she arrived. I had even hosted a birthday party for her attended by hundreds of students while she was only a senior in high school! Her picture was on a table while every one ate cake provided by the famous Rock n’ Roll McDonald’s in downtown Chicago where I was the “House Magician” and everyone signed a birthday card which we then mailed to Sara. The largest birthday party of Sara’s life, she wasn’t even at!
We finally got to date like a “normal” couple, fell in love with downtown Chicago, walking for miles along the lake shore, “parking” at romantic spots, and eventually getting engaged at the top of the Prudential Tower where my parents had their wedding dinner (as did we), got married at Moody Church with a horse and buggy ride through downtown Chicago to the tower for dinner.
While marriage isn’t always bliss, it is always a blessing to have a partner and friend to share life with through thick and thin. I have been so blessed that my pen pal has been my life pal now for seventeen years, but truly twenty-four years since she wrote me back! The day I got that first letter, August 26, 1986, I was painting a shed at a side job and my dad drove the letter to me. I put baggies over my hands to open the letter and read it. He knew I wouldn’t want to wait until I got home to read the letter from this beautiful girl overseas. Little did I know, my life would never be the same. She would one day be my wife.
I’m not sure she knew what she was getting in to when she married me – I hope she’d do it again! But as for me, I’d sure marry her again. I’m not anyone else could be as patient with me. I’m not an easy guy to keep up with or put up with. A patient and gracious wife was custom ordered for me. The story of why and how that slide show was even being showed at the church my dad was pastoring is pretty amazing, and not worth the space to type out here – but it was a fluke. Most of Sara’s dad’s supporting churches were in the upper North West of the United States, except for one lone church in Chicago because of a chance encounter that led to one church supporting them, that led to me seeing that slide show.
I think it’s because when a five year old boy starting praying for a wife – heaven went into a panic, and had to start working in overdrive to find a woman who could handle this man, and then once they found her, across the globe, they had to rearrange circumstances so that they could miraculously meet. It was a challenge, but they pulled it off. Sure, they had to use a slide projector and pens and paper and five years of letters, but eventually they met.
And seventeen years ago today, they both said, “I DO!”
It’s no secret and, of course, no surprise, that I love my son. My love for him is so intense that I sometimes wonder if I could even love another child should God ever give me another. Of course, I know I could – but having only one, it feels as though I have none to share with another. Perhaps other parents can relate to this feeling.
It’s also no secret that my little boy loves cars. Which, even as I say it, is automatically, an understatement. (Automatically is a pun, by the way!)
His is crazy – nuts – about cars! Instead of a train table like many boys, he has a “car table.” His room is decorated with cars. His favorite movie is Disney’s Cars movie, and any time he gets any present, if it isn’t a car – he is almost disappointed. When I return from a trip, he hopes I will come back with a new car for him.
The Man Cave in Estes Park, Colorado!
So here is the point of my post – there are times Luke nearly breaks my heart. When we are at a place that sells the most incredible cars – amazing cars – incredible cars – awesome cars – and as his loving Daddy I want to buy him one! And he isn’t interested.
There have been times when we have been at a place with the most spectacular cars, expensive even, and I’ve been willing to fork out the dough for one of them, and Luke has only wanted one of the cheap little $1 cars, like we have a zillion of at home. And no matter how hard I try, I can’t convince him to let me buy him one of the really nice ones. Of course, I should be happy at the money I’m saving, but as his dad, I want to bless him with one of the really cool ones knowing that in time, it will mean more to him and is more valuable. But he just politely says, “No thank you, Dad.”
This past weekend at the Mile High Flea Market it happened again. There was a booth with some model cars that are $30-$45 anywhere else for only $12. I tried so hard to convince him to pick one. “No thanks, Dad. I have enough cars.” The irony of that statement, was he was only using that line because that is what I say when he is asking for some cheap car I am explaining why I am saying, “No.” So here he is saying “no” to a car that I know he will enjoy and that would enhance his collection and is worth throwing twenty of his cheap cars in the garbage over.
I wrestled with whether to just buy one and give it to him later – but really couldn’t decide which one, as he is very particular in his choices, and if I picked the wrong one, I’d still be wasting $12 if he didn’t like it. And I decided it would still be better to save the money and help him realize later that choices have consequences should he change his mind. (Since we’ll be going back to that flea market again.)
Even his new bike is a Hot Wheels bike w/ Speedometer!
MY POINT? I wonder how many times I frustrate my Heavenly Father? I wonder how many times God wants to give me things but I settle for less? He certainly loves me as His child and has given me a lot, but he wants to give me more!
“Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him?!” Matthew 7:9-11
Just as I try to give good things to Luke, and he says, “No thank you, Dad” instead of trusting me and saying, “Sure, Daddy” and just letting me bless him – I say to God, “No thank you, God” when I should be saying, “O.K., God, I accept!” I say no by holding on to sin, by not walking in trust, by not taking the risks He presents me with, by not taking chances He places before me where I’ll need His help.
How many times do I frustrate my Father by saying, “No thank you, Daddy?” when I should be saying, “Sure, whatever you say, Daddy!” and just accepting what He wants to give me?
Is life crazy busy for you? Have you tried to get it in balance and failed? Have you strived for margin and seen it fill up over and over with church and other stuff and fought to get it out again? Have you wondered, “Can I ever win this battle to get control of my life?!”
Me too.
But at least something is different now. I have a built in pit stop in my life, called Yosemite Summit.
Every May, me and eight other children’s pastors (or ministry leaders) go to Yosemite National Park for a complete break-away from ministry to just fellowship with each other and focus on our relationship with God and our relationships with our wives and kids. And nothing else.
and…
We WALK AWAY FROM IT ALL. I’ve had to accept that while I will always be working on it, I will never master getting my daily life or week under control. There is just too much to do all the time. But at least I can look forward to once a year, every year, when I walk away from it all for four glorious days when I just enjoy God’s incredible creation in THE most spectacular place on earth. (Seriously, it is!)
If you are stressed out and thinking you don’t have time for Yosemite Summit – than YOU are exactly who DOES NEED Yosemite Summit, and believe me, not only can you leave everything and it will be waiting for you when you get back – but you will be different when you return, and everything will be lighter when you pick it upon your return, for reasons I can’t explain until you join me there…. it’s kinda a secret until you arrive and experience what happens on this retreat.
There are only THREE SPOTS LEFT on Yosemite Summit 2010. I know the economy has been rough and many church budgets have been cut. I have to pay for these spots no matter what. So if you need a scholarship to attend this event, please contact me and let me know. I will personally assist you so you can join us. I want to see this event filled with eight children’s pastors who need this retreat. You have no excuse not to come – if you need Yosemite Summit – you need only step out in faith and register to attend.
Why not trust God and build this Spiritual Pit Stop into your busy life? Your family and your SOUL will thank you… and so will your Savior.
Loved this story from the sermon this morning, so had to post it:
A man arrives at a little league game late and asks a boy in the dug out what the score is and he says, “Them 18, us zero.” The man says, “You must be discouraged?” The boy answers,
“Why would I be discouraged? We ain’t even been up to bat yet.”
That’s HOPE! Friends, no matter what you are going through, Jesus ain’t even been up to bat yet!
I wish I was a morning person like some people I know who are up before God every day by the time I roll out of bed, they are six to seven hour into their day. But there is no secret about it, I’m a night owl. I work best at night when there is no one around to bother, er, (let me rephrase that) interrupt me – and I thrive under pressure. I rarely go to bed before midnight. I still get a full night of sleep, I just get up eight hours later. I’ve always joked that my life verse is Proverbs 6:9:
“Allow no sleep to your eyes, no slumber to your eyelids.”
However, as all adults discover, this gets harder as you get older, especially since I can no longer drink Mountain Dew. (Yeah, haven’t had a clean crisp ice cold can of Dew since shortly after my heart episode. My heart meds make all soda taste disgusting, Root Beer is all I can drink in the bubbly category. But hey, I’ve lost weight!)
But I degress…
The point is, I WISH I was a morning person, because I WAS once upon a time. In high school. I used to get up early, go for a walk, read, sneak out for walks, read, study, do homework, and feel like I was half way through my day by the time I got to school. College life turned it all around, and I never adjusted back. I think not having a kid for fifteen years is part of the reason.
IF I WAS A MORNING PERSON, here is what I would do every morning: (I do these at other times of the day now, or never get to them)
Read my Bible and Pray
Read Oswald Chambers My Utmost For My Highest
Journal (Offline, by hand)
Blog (Online, yeah, here for you to read, or other sites like YS, TBT)
Saturday while my wife went to a tea at church, Luke and I decided we needed to have some fun too, so we went to McDonald’s where there was a play place! The last time we were there, about a month ago, we celebrated Luke’s first basketball basket and those of you on facebook got to see the video of I happened to capture right before my iPhone battery died! What an exciting day that was!
If you want, you can watch Luke make his FIRST basketball basket right before turning four:
Well, when given a choice of three different restaurants with play places, he chose McDonald’s when I reminded him of the basketball hoop and showed him the video on my iPhone. We got there and after eating and watching some “big boys” hog up the hoop for awhile, finally we got some court time. Luke shocked me by how quickly he got the hang of it. Soon he was nailing the shots, often in a row! Once he made THREE in a row before having some dry spells due to getting so excited he’d get erratic in his shooting for awhile. But we kept track – first it was FIVE SHOTS we celebrated, then it got up to an amazing TEN! Then it was FIFTEEN! But when he got to TWENTY even I was impressed and we had to ask another little girl what was after 20 and learn how to count so high!
Every number after that was celebrated as a major life achievement! On TWENTY-FIVE another boy came in with his dad so we surrendered the court and left as though we had just won the NBA FINALS!
Luke had not only shot 2500% better than last time, but learned to count into the 20’s better than ever before!
As we were driving down the road home, I was telling him how proud I was and he asked, “How proud are you, Daddy?” and I said, “This proud…” and I rolled down the window of the car and yelled out the window at the houses we were passing and yelled as loudly as I could,
MY SON JUST SHOT 25 BASKETS AT McDONALD’S ALL BY HIMSELF!
I looked back at Luke and the look on his face was worth a million dollars. He couldn’t believe I was THAT proud, that I would yell it out the window! After I rolled up the window, he said, “Are you so proud you would do that again?” And I said, “I’m so proud I would do that all the way home.” And I did.
I don’t think anyone actually heard me. And I have a sore throat today. But it’s O.K. My son knows that I was so proud of him I wanted the world to know it.
Have you let your kids know you are THAT proud of them lately? Your volunteers? Whoever it is you are proud of?
They are wondering, just how proud of them are you? Are you willing to shout it? Is your throat hurting yet?
My four year old is destined to become a judge. He already has a keen sense of justice. Or at least a better sense of mercy than I do.
Yesterday I could not find my shoes. I had gone up and down the stairs and searched every room of the house at least three times. I was managing to keep my grumbling humorous so as to hide the real anger that was mounting inside because I had a four year old following me and offering to help me in my hunt. But the volume and frequency of my complaints were growing even as I kept them light hearted on the surface, since I had impressionable little eyes and ears watching me. But we were eager to out the door and the delay in finding these shoes was delaying us, and I was getting acutely frustrated. (A scene I hope is not limited to our home?)
The shoes that were acquitted
In the end, my shoes were found – in the first floor coat closet – with all daddy’s shoes, right where they belong, just under some other shoes.
As I went to couch to put them on, my little boy behind me, I was eager for an outlet for my bottled up anger, but still wanting to keep things light for my son, and so I found the “perfect” fun solution, and said to Luke, “Let’s spank the bad shoes for making us late” and proceeded to spank one of the shoes for all the frustration it had inflicted upon me for the past 15 minutes and invited my son to spank the other shoe before I put them on.
Then it happened.
My four year old put me to shame.
Luke simply went into an judicial statement such as a Supreme Court Justice would before handing down a judgement in the highest court of the land.
“Daddy, when you come home, and take off your shoes, you are supposed to take off your shoes and put them in the coat closet so they don’t get dirt on the floor and make a mess in the house. That is where the shoes go. So the shoes were in the right place. So they didn’t do anything wrong. So they don’t deserve a spanking. So I’m not going to spank that shoe and you shouldn’t be spanking that other one either.“
And I’m supposed to be the father here! Where did my son get this sense of justice? And for a SHOE? I must be doing something right! I was stunned, but proud.
And no, I’m not referring to almost being struck by lightening in Yosemite last year! Nor am I directly talking about my near heart attack last year either – though for all practical purposes I might as well be. If almost dying twice in 2009 taught me anything (and it taught me a lot!) it made me realize that long life is not something you should assume. So let me say it again, and I really hope you will hear me this time: (this is now directly from my journal on my solo sabbatical)
Everyone ought to almost die. If not, they really should try to pretend or reflect on what it means to live as though they are not sure of long life.
Let me set the record straight. I’m not afraid of dying. Never was. But after almost dying (twice!) I’m no longer afraid of living! I refuse to put off the life I want. If that sounds selfish, let me rephrase it – I refuse to put off what I believe God is calling me to do. (sound better?) I no longer assume far off “somedays” exist! Two to three years is as long as I assume I have. That DOESN’T mean I think I’m a dead man in five years! Without going into detail – I have a clean bill of health, I avoided a heart attack, and have a stent in a healthy heart. It just means that if I want to do something, I START PLANNING IT! I know better now – start planning it, or it’ll never happen!
Someday is just another word for NEVER!
What are you saying you will do someday? Write a book? Go on some dream vacation? Produce a resource? Start a business? (Go on Yosemite Summit or Unbridled?) I can’t even guess what it is for YOU, but YOU know what I’m talking about… I’m scratching that itch RIGHT NOW. I know I am.
The point is, start planning it NOW. At least get out a pad of paper and start scratching out the first few steps.
One of my life long dreams was to go to Yosemite in Winter. It seemed impossible. The only way it happened was to start planning it. And then God came along and took care of the “impossible” part for me! He surprised me by taking care of the one detail I couldn’t manage. Do you think God won’t do that for you? Do you think He loves me more than you? Bah!
Watch this video of my little dream come true. This took over four years to come true. Even longer if you count the years I was too scared and too busy to dream the dream! Enjoy! Two days snow shoeing through Yosemite in winter and then ask yourself,
What “someday” am I not trusting God for? And start planning it.
These are images and journal entries from my Solo Sabbatical to Yosemite in January 2010. (Pictures are all from Day One, two more days yet to come.)
Day 1 – February 1, 2010
First Glimpse of Half Dome - Always Stunning
Knowing God.
Started thinking about this topic this morning – so been mulling it around all morning as I snow shoed around the base of El Capitan and Merced River taking pictures today. (Love snow shoeing by the way.) Really thought it would be a lot more laborious than it is, it’s easy and enjoyable. But anyway, “knowing God” – isn’t that the promise of the Christian life? We can know God!
I gave away my Badger Pass ski lift passes each morning (also included tour bus passes and other perks) at breakfast that came with my Lodge “all inclusive deal” because I didn’t need them, the meal vouchers were all I needed. I’m here just to hike and take pictures. I was offered money each time and just said nope, “they’re as free as God’s salvation.” I almost added, “I hope you’ll get to know Him like I do.” That’s what got me thinking about this. How well DO I know Him?
El Capitan Aglow in Late Afternoon
That’s supposed to be the big offer of salvation! How many Gospel tracts have on the cover, “You can KNOW GOD!” Then why don’t I feel like I know Him? (Should I not be admitting this?) Oh, I know a lot about him – probably more than most people. Try me. And not just on a biblical knowledge basis either, philosophically even. (Don’t ask me to explain, it’s complicated.) ;0) But know God? – come on, are you serious? He’s GOD for crying out loud! How am I supposed to KNOW Him? What does that even mean?
Understand Him? Yeah, right. Predict His behavior? I wish. Anticipate His moves? Never. Influence His decisions? You could argue prayer – but that’s a stretch. Hang out with Him and shoot the breeze? I hardly think so. Worship Him? Certainly! (I’m doing that here in Yosemite!) But that isn’t knowing Him.
Brideveil Falls in Winter
I worship Him (especially here in Yosemite) precisely because I don’t know Him enough – how He created this place, etc. I understand what He expects, wants, and demands of me well enough – and how far short I fall – and I understand His mercy and grace, even friendship and salvation through the person and work of Jesus Christ — and have accept it!! BUT KNOW HIM?!?!?
El Capitan On Fire from the Evening Sun
I’m not so sure about that – and I’m not even convinced I’m supposed to KNOW HIM – just His TRUTH. The more I marvel at the wonders of Yosemite – the more I am convinced my purpose is not much different from that of Half Dome or El Capitan. I think I have about as much chance of knowing God as one of those Rocks! And only man’s pride tells me I have more chance of knowing God than a towering tree or a flowing river.
Seriously. The more I think about who God is – the more I see that I am just another of His creations. Sure – I’m MORE than a rock – I can talk, write in this journal! (or blog) I’m self aware – and aware that I’m self aware - and aware that I’m aware that I’m aware and so on! I have a free will, and therefore the capacity for love as well as rebellion – I can be loyal to my Creator – or selfishly act independent of Him even as He sustains my very existence and breath. But know Him?
A Snow Covered Half Dome from Sentinel Bridge
I’d like to meet someone who claims to know God. Seriously. (email me if you do.) I’d like to know what that looks like. For me, I’d like to stop telling people, “You can know God personally.” I’m not sure that’s true. However, perhaps we can say, “God knows you personally, and you can be right with Him.” I think I want to give up trying to “know God” and instead focus on being right with God. Living a life of obedience that pleases God, honors God – and reflects His glory.
Half Dome from Sentinel Bridge After Dark (time lapse)
As I said earlier, my purpose, as a creation of God, is no different that these mountains here – it is to be a testimony to God. The only difference is that they are far more limited in what they can do, however they get to do it for for hundreds of years! I don’t get as long – but have been given much more ability to testify! With words – actions – love – attitudes – etc. HOW I LIVE, the testimony of my life.
I’m not sure my goal in life ought to be to “know God” – I think it is rather that others might be right with God too because they knew me.
Yosemite Fall Taken in Pitch Darkness with Open Shutter
I wonder every time I come here, how people can be in Yosemite and not believe in God. I ought to wonder how people can know me and not believe in God.
