Kidologist.com: Karl Bastian's Personal Site and Blog
Archive for Humor
Over on the Kidology Facebook Page (Have you liked it? Hmmmm?) We posted a status letting folks know about a great article from our good friend Kathie Phillips. (Visit her blog: KidMinspiration.com) It’s a pretty normal sounding status about getting ready for the fall. Then Chris Gidens makes a comment that totally changes it.
Read the status – read Chris’s comment, the RE-READ our status again. And get a good laugh!
Thanks, Chris, for making my day! Too bad Adam and Eve didn’t have Kidology to prepare for the Fall!
Want to Prepare for the Fall?
I had to hunt this down after one of the pictures was asked about on my Facebook page. I thought I’d go ahead and preserve it and share it for fun – though hesitantly, since I need you to know, it was in HUMOR, and I myself have been “cured” of my Mountain Dew addiction since 2009. (My name is Karl Bastian and I am a Dewoholic! But I’ve been sober for five years!)
Also, please know, I never actually gave my sweet baby any Mountain Dew! But I did find it funny that a baby bottle nipple fit perfectly over the top of a soda can, and had fun freaking people out with that fact!
HOW TO RAISE A DEW BABY:
They sure to grow up fast!
My sister posted this to my Facebook Wall. For some odd reason, it made her think of me…
My reply was:
No way! You’ve got to tweet it, post twitpic images, update your Facebook status, check into Four Square friends to see if any of your friends are in the building too, post a video of the fire to YouTube and do a blog post discussing your thoughts on the cause of the fire and the general lack of safety in the building, and THEN exit!
But it did make me laugh, (and think). Truth me told, I might try to pull off a tweet on my way out of the building. (If I could do so safely, of course! And if I could do so without endangering anyone else, of course!)
But do we tweet and facebook too much? Certainly! I sometimes wonder if when Jesus returns, Christians will miss it because they will all be looking down at their cell phones Tweeting:
Jesus is here! #secondcoming Betcha wish you’d accepted Him? #heaven #hell #salvation #toolate #John316
Jesus will be yelling, “Hey! Look up! I’m here, time to put the cell phones down!”
Ten bucks, there is no Internet or cell coverage in heaven. We’ll have to just walk around actually talk to each other.
What a concept.
I can’t reveal my “insider” source, but here is a “sneak peek” at what’s coming next from Steve Jobs at Apple… (with some history to show you the trends)
So, what do you think? Are you going to get in line?
Next entries »
A trusted friend sent this to me, due to my past heart issues, so I thought I would also pass it along as a caring friend to my readers. It’s original source is the Internet, so you know it is reliable!
Dr. Nut Tin Wong
Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart only good for so many beats, and that it… Don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Beer also made of grain. Fruits & grains good for you. Bottom up!
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio two to one, etc.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can’t think of single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No pain…… good!
Q: Aren’t fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food are fried these days in vegetable oil. How could getting more vegetable be bad for you?!?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy?!? Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for your figure, explain whale to me..
Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! ‘Round’ is shape!
Well… I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.